I've been intending

Ok, so I'm about 5 years late in jumping on the blogging bandwagon.  After all, what do I have to say that is worthy of the time anyone might spend to read it on a regular basis?  On the other hand, there have been many moments in recent weeks when I've thought, "Oh, that could be something I could blog about."  My next thought is always, "Just put it in a journal, Sarah."  But my many attempts at journaling through the years have never proven successful.  I'm really not sure why this is going to stand any better chance.  We'll chalk it up to my eternal optimism.  :) 

I used to write updates about our move to England, but having been here almost two years now, that seems kind of presumptuous.  It isn't as though we're missionaries keeping in contact with our supporters.  Still, I know our parents, at least, would like to read occasional notes about our life here.  And, as long as I'm having "I should blog about that!" thoughts, why not try it out?

My bloggable thought for this morning is how quickly good intentions get derailed.  I was telling myself all morning as I was getting dressed, etc., that I needed to spend 10 minutes in silence when I first got to my office this morning (more about why later).  Well, as I was attempting to unlock and open my 100-year-old office door--which I know is always a two-hand job, but I keep trying to manage with just one--my lunch bag took a dive onto the floor, and the soup escaped its container and managed to baptize everything else in the lunch bag.  So, after an hour and a half of telling myself to do something, 10 minutes of cleaning up that mess sent the intended silence right out of my mind!

Now here I am almost three hours later and still no silence.  Last night I led our discipleship group at church, and we talked about the sermon text from Sunday, Matthew 11:28-30, "Come to me all you who are weary..."  We spent the whole evening discussing rest, stillness, and being yoked with Jesus, and our 'homework' for the week is to spend 10 minutes in restful silence and listening every day.  We did a couple of practice runs together as a group--it was not surprising to me how many people were uncomfortable sitting in silence.  I have enjoyed doing this ever since my first experience in a workshop at the Wesleyan/Holiness Women Clergy conference in Colorado Springs.  But somehow, even though I always find it a wonderful time, I have failed to incorporate it into my regular routine. 

Intentions, intentions.  I've intended to write in a journal many, many times over the years, and haven't kept it up.  I've intended to give time to silence and listening to God many, many times over the years, and haven't kept it up.  I intended to spend 10 minutes in silence first thing this morning, and didn't.  (My track record may suggest that beginning a blog is a hopeless cause!)  But I will never forget what Pastor Brian at Trinity told us one week: it's called 'practicing the faith' for a reason, because it takes practice.  You don't just try to run a marathon; you train to run a marathon.  Likewise, you don't just try to live a life of faith; you train to live a life of faith.  So this week, another training session, and off I go into silence.  I'll let you know how it goes.